1) Fish where the fish are - To meet a lawyer, you need to be in a lawyer-rich location. Topping the list is Washington D.C. and New York.

2) Go in for the kill - Once you’re in a lawyer-rich environment, you’ll need to go in for the kill. Place where lawyers spend the most time – the office; next best option is a bar – that is, a bar association event; number three option – actual bars near courthouses.

3) Beware the lawyer personality - Studies show that lawyers tend to be defensive, argumentative, skeptical, and anti-social. However, the bright side is that you won’t experience these things often because lawyers are rarely at home.

4) Only repeat things you hear from credible people –  Lawyers are trained to destroy witness credibility on cross examination. That’s why if you ever repeat something you’ve heard, you should volunteer the tipster’s name, education, occupation, and criminal history.

5) Use Latin whenever possible - Lawyers feel warm and fuzzy when they hear Latin. An easy way to use Latin without knowing any is to give your pets Latin names. When you say, “Why, yes, I have a pet! It’s a poodle named Per Stirpes!” any lawyer will turn to putty in your hands.

6) Make love notes long and confusing - Brevity and clarity make lawyers feel uncomfortable and agitated, much like normal people feel at the DMV.

7) Don’t be surprised when your lawyer sweetheart nitpicks everything - When it happens, don’t accuse him of splitting hairs. That would be like accusing a dolphin of swimming. Instead, thank him for being both a gentleman (or woman) and a scholar.

8) Always cite sources - When in doubt, point to scientific studies, real or imagined. For example, instead of saying you “feel” that fried Twinkies should be illegal, say they’ve been associated with stroke and suicidal ideation. Your lawyer lover may chastise you for sloppy research later, but will respect your appeal to authority.

9) Never speak of beliefs not backed by empirical evidence - For example, if you believe in the healing power of magnets, keep it to yourself. Instead, loudly and passionately accuse wait staff and small children of non sequiturs. Throw in a disparaging comment about the American education system for extra points.

10) Remember, it can all be very worth it - Lawyers, despite their posturing and sometimes-aggressive demeanor, are really very sweet at heart. With a little training, persistence and patience, a lawyer can be the love of your life.

Again, the full article is here.

There’s an App for that (one hella expensive app at that).

Priced at $1000, BarMax is officially the most expensive app on itunes. It promises the essence of a $4,000 barbri course for a fraction of the price and sans 50 lbs of books.
I’m not sure I want to be a guinea pig for this course. It’s currently only for the California bar anyways, the only bar that lets non JDs take the exam… just what this profession needs, more lawyers, haha. [via gizmodo]

Source

The first is called Newsmap.   A Japanese website that maps news headlines in a very unique way.   No need to further explain, you just need to check it out!

Second is Popurls.  An elegant design that gathers all the important headlines and cool videos across the world wide web into one portal.

Enjoy.  Hopefully these websites can distract you from your happy Monday workload.

Any thoughts?  Help a brotha out?

Another example, Thanksgiving.  We didn’t kill the Indians, we didn’t take their lands, we didn’t give them smallpox but yet, we are still Thankful.  Every year, our extended family come together and has a “traditional” Thanksgiving dinner with some fish sauce on the side. Who would have thought, Asians eating turkey…usually we eat duck without the duck sauce please.

Next, Chinese new years.  If you guys haven’t notice, I am Vietnamese. I know, I know, girls love Vietnamese guys, please hold your comments.  And yes, we love Pho and no, my mom is not in the nail business.  Anyways, about Chinese New Years, what did we do, we “borrowed” it and created Tet (aka Vietnamese New Years).  On that day we eat, drink and get red envelopes. Another thing we borrowed was Communism but lets not talk about that today.  Thanks China!

I think for next year, I am going to recommend celebrating Hanukkah and Ramadan.

Until then, regardless of who you are, where you come from or what you believe in, follow our family tradition – always find ways to have fun and celebrate the good times.

For today at least, happy holidays and happy birthday Jesus.